Merry Go Round

I had plenty of ideas on what I wanted to do with this blog and I’ve failed on all of them. DOH! So rather than just say great things about what I want to do with it, lets just say I have ideas but because I’m busy with kids and life I haven’t been implementing them.

I’ll get around to writing good stuff at some point. Today I gave some advice to a young student about how to create a presence online. I said be consistently putting stuff out there. And I am going to use my own advice and put something on my blog. (And the next thing I was ABOUT to say was consistently.) I’m gonna catch myself before I say that though, I know that the best intensions are there but not the habits.

SO I will post a blog that says… I’M AT LTUE 2014. If you see me walking around, come say hi! I’m all by myself usually. I come here to be lifted up by all the awesome that is in one room. Or under one Hotel. This place bleeds talent and some really talented people come here yearly to give us all a boost. Which is why I come back year after year. It’s my fill my cup weekend.

Anyhow, I’ve been going to this conference for 5 years! This is my 5th year. Oh my goodness… I can’t believe I’ve been this many times. I’m really gonna need to explain to myself WHY I haven’t gotten anything published yet.

I’m really empty right now. And yet as I say that, I’m here at LTUE trying to fill it. And there are many online friends giving me words of encouragement that are also filling my cup up too.

Being creative is fueled by filling that cup for me. And it’s not all by the stuff others do to fill it. Sometimes it’s just finding a quiet corner in my house to sit and gaze at the clouds as they go lazily by. Sometimes it's getting hugs from my boys, cause they give really great hugs.

First Order of Business:

Updates! I haven't been keeping this blog up very well. And I intend to do better at that this year. I was busy all of 2011 doing lots of things; podcasting, reviewing comics, getting interested in writing comics, and doing the ANWA Newsletter. AND on top of all that being a mom and a wife! So, two full time jobs.

Yeah, superwoman couldn't cut it if she were me and a few things had to give.

I've stepped back from a ton of podcasting ventures. I started a comic book writing class (which is excellent) and then I went to "Life, The Universe, and Everything Symposium" and realized that I comic book writing, while interesting, fun, and I might actually enjoy doing, isn't where I want to be right now. Mostly due to a keynote address that I attended at the LTUE symposium, just really hit me that I'm distracted with comic book writing and not focusing on my one real love. (And novel writing has been my focus since I was a kid.) Kinda an expensive thing to realize now, in light of the comic class, but still not a total loss as writing stories which ever medium still involves meeting at a blank screen/page and putting something there. And I'm definitely learning its the same process regardless what format you write.

And then the big hit that is happening in all this… I won't be the ANWA newsletter editor much longer. I have extremely mixed feelings on this as I've really enjoyed being editor and I wanted to continue for another year at least (if not longer). (If I could pick the one job I'd excel at and would find myself perfectly suited to perform, it would be designer and inspirer. Two things I have a LOT of training in. And something I never tire of, nor out of ideas.) I won't go into much detail or opinion about it other than to say my leaving does not come without me fighting for the position and still losing. And no, it's not an amicable departure. I guess I wouldn't be as upset about it if I hadn't been 100% vocal for the last few months about intending to stay on and being told the position was mine for as long as I wanted it. (Like I said, I fought and worked hard for this position.) I've put a lot of hours, thought, and spiritual effort into creating a positive and uplifting forum that all members could enjoy and be inspired to write from. I've gotten a lot of feed back from ANWA members who've been inspired by it. So how things have turned when so much positive has come out of it… It's a big slap to the face. And I'd be lying if I didn't say I'm really hurt by this.

So February has been a ball of both positive and negative outcomes… It's been intense… traveling, drama, all out battling for something I've invested a lot of time and effort into, doing an online comic writing class, more traveling, then being inspired by a symposium… by other writers who've battled their own wars on their path to success… It was exactly what I needed when I've been so low and in the dumps. And then comic reviewing side of things… suddenly the stories are out of this world as well… so all around the lowest lows of my year and the highest highs to help me through them. It's been very emotional across the board.

So what's in store for Aimee then?

More time to write is on the horizon. Although I'm still working through emotions as so many ups and downs, consequences of being one of those people that fully invests herself in her endeavors, just play havoc with my ability to work on the page. If I'm not gushing about a story I read I'm ranting about my frustrations for the last two weeks. Yay for being an emotional person! And I highly sensitive one at that. (Which I find is one of my strengths rather than a weakness. But it too needs its place to breathe in my life...)

So, goal time… March is my pick up and move on month. Where I expect that I'll buckle down and get back on my writer track and do what I was born to do. This blog post is a note to my subconscious that whatever happened in February happened, don't let it get you down. There's your mourning time to work through things both ups and downs… but come March 1st, you get back in the game. I'm a fighter. Fighters take on wounds at times and they need to heal. Do that, but don't let it keep you from jumping back in the ring.

"Look me in the eye.

It's okay if you're scared. So am I.

But we're scared for different reasons. I'm scared of what I won't become, you're scared of what I could become.

Look at me.

I won't let myself end where I started. I won't let myself finish where I began.

I know what is within me. Even if you can't see it yet.

Look me in the eyes. I have something more important than courage.

I have patience.

I will become what I know I am."

- Michael Jordan

Oh My Goodness!

I have not written in this blog for most of this year. Not that it is a bad thing... just been busy with everything. Whether it was with my ANWA responsibilities, family, or writing don't have time to do anything else... it was something.

So I will try and be better about this. I got a new faster computer this fall and I'm enjoying it. Still transferring stuff from the old one to the new one and all that fun stuff. Go me!

But I'm still writing. In fact, I did NaNoWriMo this month... half the month was great. Then I hint a block... not sure if it was because I was trying to make the text too perfect or I just couldn't find my happy place? For about a week, I suddenly was too tired to do anything by time the evening rolled around I wanted to just go to bed. And I did. Then Thanksgiving hit and I had guests at my home and I think worry and a racing mind killed the muse there.

SO, NaNoWriMo... the point is to make you write and to develop good stable writing habits right? So it was a success if it got me to write 10K words this month. And that makes me a happy camper.

This evening I opened a twitter account:

twitter.com/writtenvein

Yep, I tweet now.

And at the end of this year I will no longer be the President of American Night Writers Association. Yep. My two years is over. I'll be back though. It's been fun! I've learned so much and it really helped me to gain the confidence that I was lacking at that point in my life. I can say with confidence I feel more like a writer today then I ever have been in my whole life. And I'm certainly writing more than I ever have before too. All thanks to ANWA and attending conferences!!

Which reminds me... LTUE anyone? Gonna be here in February! And then of course the wonderful ANWA conference the following weekend! Yep that's right readers, February is gonna be really crazy fun with conferences and stuff!

The ANWA Conference "Writing at the Speed of Life" is a two day conference this year with pitch sessions and a workshop the Friday before. You can register for the conference here. It's gonna be really fun so register now all the details are at the website. You can also follow the conference tweets as well at:

twitter.com/ANWA_LDS

ANWA Conference 2011 is also on facebook too!

Okay well, now I gotta go write.

Month of Conferences:

February is my month for writing conferences. I'm leaving tomorrow at the opening of the morning to travel to Provo Utah for the first one this month.

http://www.ltue.org/

It's FREE! At least to attend but since I'll be driving and needing food, staying with friends, it isn't completely free.

I'll let you know how it was when I get back.

The next one will be Saturday February 27th all day. The Annual ANWA Conference, which I am hosting. Well, not me alone. ANWA is putting it on, but I'm the President so I'll be the one introducing and welcoming everyone to the conference. It'll be fun. You should come, we've got lots of great speakers and presenters. It's going to rock! We have some nice stuff planned and you'll be sorry if you miss out! Go to the following link to register!

http://anwa-lds.com/conference.html

I'm also the one who created and designed the new ANWA logo. Yeah, I've been meaning to post some stuff about it but I just have been busy. So I'll post more later!